I'm sorry...

I didn't mean to,
I didn't want it to get this far,

I've lost everything I am in this sweet disease, and now I can't go back. I don't want to eat, and when i do it's always something that has been offered to me - i never want people to see that i'm truly not eating.
My own little secret - everyone is playing hooky.
I'm so sorry.

I'm writing during a breakdown. I feel so fat, I'm crying. I don't want this anymore, I want to change.
Maybe if i change, you'll like me again - you'll want me again.
Focus on the aesthetics, let the rest fall. I don't want you to worry about me.
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry
im sorry

im sorry you dont know
im sorry i cant tell you
im sorry you'll never know
im sorry you can't see it as me
i'm sorry i ate today
i'm sorry i don't want to eat
i'm sorry i forget the reasons why
i'm sorry i binge
i'm sorry i purge
i'm sorry i didn't meant to
i'm sorry for putting this on you
i'm sorry for letting this consume me
i'm sorry for not being strong enough
I'm sorry for not eating
i'm sorry for misleading
i'm sorry for lying
i'm sorry for cheating
i'm sorry i can't be who you want
i'm sorry you don't think i should change
i'm sorry for not changing
i'm so so sorry it's not me.

Ana has a grip on me, and on my soul. I can't do anything anymore as me.

i didn't mean for it to be like this.