I Am Snape.

Today's been whatever. I'm basically at 0 cals so I don't really care about that.

I'm worrying now that Ryan isn't going to want me when I'm done, and I don't know what his reaction would be if I told him. But I can't say that I don't not like him asking me about whether I'm eating or not...
What's wrong with me? Hell if I know...

I'm just beginning to really feel like this all is a HUGE competition. Who can be the skinniest, who can compete to get the guy, and it really all sucks. I think that life should just be a fairytale. The princess gets saved by a prince in shining armour - the one that she wants - and they live happily ever after with their company being all that is needed.
No duh, this is never going to happen, but if it did I would seriously be probably the happiest girl ever. I wish everything would just hurry up and be okay again...

I don't know, I'm beginning to think I've just given up on every other guy. If  you're a fan of Harry Potter you'll get this reference - it's from mainly the seventh book.
How Snape feels for Lily? I think that's what's going to be me and Ryan... Like I'm going to just spend so much time on him when I could have easily moved on, and there's nothing I can do to move on...like I'm trapped.
I'd find a clip if i could, but the movie came out today in theathers...
I don't want to waste away my life, but at the same time, why not? I feel like he's the only one I'm going to really love, and that's all. Unfortunatly I'm 15, but at the same time, what's age to define something like this anyways? It's been ever since I met him three years ago.. :/
-sigh-

That Mason dude, yeah I don't think anything's actually happening, we're not as close as I thought we were I guess... and he doesn't ask "what's up" he just says "are you okay?"
um...no but I'm going to tell you I'm fine anyways. fucker. :/ grr.